Wait till we learn how much the Luigi trial jurors are paid to hang him.

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Pam Bondi is 60 years old. She gets weekly baby blood transfusions, and sleeps in a sensory deprivation pod.

(Only one of these things is verifiably true. The other two are just guesses… but probably.)

We know he’s not joking. The question is whether the military, sworn to uphold the Constitution, will do anything about it when the time comes.

I’ll just add this to the long of things I’d love to see, but never will.

I’m sorry the President of my country is an asshole.

I’m genuinely ashamed to be American now.

They’ll probably come around to the realization in time, but we won’t see that interview.

Who would’a thunk cops are really bad at reading the room?

Billionaires live in a weird bubble. Money and power twist the mind and destroy the soul.

Never idolize a billionaire, they’re the closest thing to evil incarnate that walks the Earth. Remember, the Devil will present itself as friendly, alluring, and attractive. So, at least we know they aren’t the Devil, but as close as reality can get, maybe.

Imagine Trump, or any other billionaire, saying something like this. Can’t do it? Me neither.

I’m an accelerationist, when it comes to this situation. Let’s get the super-villain phase over with and move on to final scene.

Their vices all run the same direction: They do the things that are forbidden to we poors. They get off on the power of getting away with the taboo and illegal. The only time they’re held to account is if they fuck over one of their own. Epstein wasn’t brought down because he was a pedo, he was taken down because he was blackmailing the rich. Madoff stole from the rich.

So, do I get back everything I paid into it for the past 40 years? Is that part of the plan? If not, who gets that money, let me guess.

Inflation was always going to go back up, and they all damn well knew it. Expect interest rates to stay high for the foreseeable future.

I think it’s far more sinister than that. In this case, I attribute to malice what could be explained by incompetence.

No one who voted for these assholes read Project 2025. They bought all the lies, because Trump said he hates the people they hate, and everything said against him was “fake news”.

The morons doomed us all to dealing with the fucking billionaires in direct control of our government.

If the filthy rich know anything, it’s that quashing one’s personal morals takes money.

Super glad we put Trump in office so he could make Mexico pay tariffs and bring down food prices. Feels so good to be owning the libs.

/fucking sarcasm

/SMDH

“Utah now has zero reported cavities! We were right to ban fluoride.”