Cyrus Draegur

Rapist Russell Brand charged with Attempted Comedy

Their colleagues trying to decry what’s happening would be very hesitant to admit that the vector was through grindr

Bro it is actually insane how many conservatives you could blackbag and disappear if you just Catfished them on Grindr. They’d never be able to admit anyone among their ilk ever got lured by gay sex into being bound, blindfolded, gagged, anesthetized, whisked off to upstate Vermont, and tossed into a wood chipper.

it’s a shame these chud cocksuckers have less than zero capacity for self-awareness. Facts and evidence don’t matter; they’re utterly deranged and incapable of perceiving reality. Anything that disagrees with their precious snowflake feelings is ‘fake news’ and they just keep handing each other participation trophies. I have zero empathy or sympathy for them. Every time I see them suffer, I make it a point to chomp a big fat slice of schadenfreude pie while I point and laugh. It’s not like they’re real people anymore, now that the fascist mind-virus has erased who they used to be and replaced it with unquestioning loyalty to their mandarin chief.

Autopilot literally switched ITSELF off less than half a second from the moment of impact. it didn’t try to stop the car, it just shut itself off so it couldn’t be blamed.

Imagine if someone whipped throwing knives at your back and then tried to argue “but your honor I was not holding any knives at the time of the stabbing”

Fuck Tesla, fuck Elon, fuck every simp who shits excuses out their mouths for him

(I mean, not YOU, you aren’t doing any of those things; I’m just saying, those people. In general.)

As unlikely as New England becoming Canada’s newest province would be, it’s STILL more likely than Canada ever becoming the 51st state.

I say this with admiration for Canada: when you back crazy cannucka into corners, they INVENT NEW WAR CRIMES that the international community hasn’t thought to write laws against.

Canada burned the white house to the fucking ground before.

They’ll do it again.

AND AMERICA WILL HAVE IT COMING.

I just wish New England could go ahead and join Canada already to ruin the US federal government’s economy and industry. Cascadia (the states of California, Washington, and Oregon) should become a province too. what’s left of the United States can’t survive without receiving affirmative action participation trophies and charity from us. The whole world would be a better place.

it’s time to “chuck” Schumer.

the best thing for the world right now would be for america to suffer the consequences of its poor decisions. the beatings must continue until we start making better decisions.

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truly was the bigger man in that room.

it’s so dystopian even Kefka would be proud too.

(as in, the omnicidal maniac clown Big Bad Evil Guy from Final Fantasy 6)

if i had a nickel for every deep-voiced woman named Elizabeth wrapped up in a massive fraudulent enterprise, I’d have ten cents but it’s still weird that it happened twice

(the other liz)

What the actual FUCK, THIS SUMMARY LEAVES OUT MAJOR CRITICAL VITAL INFORMATION

MULTIPLE masked gunmen! UNIDENTIFIED! they have no fucking clue who they even ARE?! JESUS FUCKING CHRIST THE HEADLINE SHOULD BE “UNIDENTIFIED MASKED GUNMEN ATTACK PUBLIC CIVIL SERVICE OFFICE, MURDERING THREE”

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Feels like a pyramid to me. If I don’t have good sleep and good hydration I struggle mightily to control my food intake, and if I’m eating too much then I’m aching so badly and feeling so sluggish that I barely get anywhere at the gym.

Eating that will not make you happy.

It will give you at best a brief moment of pleasure, but the pain it will bring later is not worth it!

It’s not just ONE burger–that is yet another burger. An element of self-harm, another step on a journey that takes you FURTHER away from who you want to be! Don’t take it! Draw the line! Let this be the moment you STOPPED the trek toward ruin!

Skipping this one is not depriving you, you’ve had them before; they’re old news. You know what’s GREAT news though? Being able to tie your own shoe laces. Being able to WIPE YOUR OWN ASS. Being able to climb a set of stairs without feeling like you’re about to die. Being able to stand in place without becoming out of breath. Be grateful that you have not crossed those thresholds because YOU STOPPED NOW.

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some were! The rest were useful idiots–just totally unwitting dupes who had no idea who they were REALLY working for. The groups that handled transportation and logistics took “donations” as “non-profit” organizations but the Koch brothers absolutely did appoint individuals to set it up on their behalf AND provided basically all of the funding. The organizers themselves or the people feeding instructions to them were either class traitors if they knew the resources were coming from one source OR they weren’t even legitimate members of the working class in the first place but only pretended to be so as to blend in with their marks.

The tea party, however, turned out to be an entirely artificial astroturfed “movement” that got its funding from the Koch brothers. They only came to exist because they were deemed a potentially profitable investment to the one percent. Same goes for Kerry getting “swiftboated”. It was always about money.

I could swear this shit is like the plot from The Producers. They’ve monetized their incompetence and realized that they can make more money from losing elections than from winning. They collect billions in donations from desperate people and then launder it, squandering it on ineffectual “vote blue” spam while awarding lucrative no bid consultancy contracts with friendly party aristocracy insiders for massive kick backs and “speaking fees”.

Kamala “I’m Speaking” Harris never intended to do anything OTHER than speaking. Seems the democrat establishment doesn’t want any of us remembering that TALK IS CHEAP.