Because I need money

Tell her what your favorite dinosaur is.

Joke’s on that guy, all the women on the Internet are really just this guy:

You can’t even get a Baja Blast at a Kentacohut over there?

Just don’t kick a giant mouse in the butt and you’ll be fine. Otherwise, you’ll become a political prisoner.

I took a IQ test online it said I Genius.

A wizard did it.

He could just take an H from a different car, nobody would know the difference.

It’s like Al Capone’s vault all over again.

Anybody who believes that he would actually do this is someone who would fall for the wallet inspector.

It’s Canary M. Burns who’s in charge.

You have a house?

Where’s Skifree?

Damn leftist, they ruined leftism!

Could Joey Chestnut eat hamburgers like that?

No, more forever wars in the Middle East!

What if a cop kills a cop?

Telemarketer should’ve been number 1.